


The Refugee

by jinyoungster



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Luwoo, M/M, North Korea, north korean, north korean refugee, taeten - Freeform, woocas
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2019-04-23
Packaged: 2019-06-28 21:46:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 14,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15715707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jinyoungster/pseuds/jinyoungster
Summary: Kim Jungwoo finally got the chance to runaway from North Korea with his family, his days of suffering in the hands of the terrible government were just a step away from being done. At least, that was what he thought when he stepped on the fisherman's boat.





	1. Runaway

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is the first fanfiction that I'm writing entirely in english, so please pardon me if anything is wrong, I did my best and some friends helped me to review it!  
> Also, this is the first story that I'm posting here so give me some support if you like it uwu
> 
> PS.: I'll post it here, but also on Wattpad and Asian Fanfics!  
> PS2.: I posted a small trailer for this if you want to check it out ^^ ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNbe_57FRuM )

 It was an extremely rainy night in Chosan. Mud covered Jungwoo’s feet while he ran, with his parents and the fisherman who was helping them, to China. His clothes were basically glued to his body and he couldn't differentiate his own tears from the strong rain. His body was losing strength after running and hiding for so many hours.

 

 But it was almost over. All the hunger and difficulties that him and his family went through during his whole life crossed his mind the moment he stepped on the boat to cross the Yalu river. They were almost free. They were almost there.

 

 And then… the deafening sounds of the shots he was so afraid of cut the air along with a loud scream.

 

 Jungwoo’s mother was laid, still, on the muddy floor. He stared at his father trying to help his basically already dead mother while trying to move, but his body wasn’t listening to his commands.

 

 There was so much blood covering her that not even the strong rain was able to clean it.

 

“Dad!” The scream made the father look at his desperate son, who was waving madly for him to run to the boat. But it was too late for him to go since the boat was already leaving, so he just smiled while three more shots were heard from the distance.

 

 Two shots hit his father’s head and, the last one, hit Jungwoo’s left shoulder.

 

 The impact made him fall, but he was still on the boat. His head was spinning, blood and rain were covering more and more his poor clothes, the view of his parents dying in front of his eyes made him worse. The fisherman pulled him inside the cabin quickly when saw him on the floor, and ran back to drive the boat.

 

 Jungwoo looked at the guy next to him. He was as calm as was possible in that situation.

 

“Don't worry. We’re almost there. You'll be safe-” And then everything became pitch black.

 

+++

 

 His whole body felt heavier than ever was when he woke up.

 

_ What… happened…? _

 

 And everything came to his mind at once, making him want to scream his lungs out, but just a small groan came out of his mouth. Jungwoo looked around the strange room he was in, his heart almost exploding with fear.

 

“Oh, you're awake!” A low and rough voice came from behind, followed by a relieved sigh. “I was starting to think that you were dead. I almost freaked out, man.”

 

 A tall man walked towards him, kneeling down to look at him. His huge hand landed softly on Jungwoo’s forehead and took the other to his own. Then the most beautiful and genuine happy smile the north korean defector ever saw in his entire life crossed the man's face.

 

“You are getting better!” He got up and jumped in excitement. Jungwoo was really confused and scared, but also curious.

 

“ _ W-Who…”  _ He finally said with a lot of effort. The tall man widened his eyes to the soft sound of Jungwoo’s voice and kneeled again.

 

“No, no, no, no. Don't speak yet, you're weak and hurt. Hm… you must be confused and scared, right? I’ll tell you what happened, so don’t speak and just listen to me, ok?” Jungwoo blinked. “Ok, I'll take that as a ‘yes'. So… my name is Wong Yukhei, you’re in China right now, more specifically in Beijing. I was waiting for you in Hong Kong but since you were hurt I came here to be with you. If you’re wondering why I came to stay with you it’s because I assigned to take of a north korean defector and you were the one, so I’ll be by your side for some time and, if you don’t believe it, I have documents to prove and I can call the guy who brought you here if you want to! And... I-I am  _ so _ sorry about your parents, Jungwoo…”

 

 The north korean man felt hot tears falling on his cheeks. Once again the tall man, that now he knew his name was Yukhei, widened his eyes and put his hand on Jungwoo’s cheeks, cleaning his tears.

 

“Please… don't cry…” He whispered and held the other’s hand. “I can't imagine how hard it is for you right now. But you survived and now you're free. Well, not totally… you're still stuck in a bed with a hole on your shoulder but at least the bullet is gone! Oh, I forgot to tell you something. Since you couldn't go to a hospital I brought a doctor here and he took your bullet out. You've been sleeping for two days now.”

 

_ He talks too much,  _ Jungwoo thought while looking into Yukhei’s eyes.

 

“I'll bring some food for you! Please don't try  to get up, even though you are getting better you're still as pale as your sheets.” Yukhei smiled again and, for some reason, that soft smile made Jungwoo feel safe for the first time in years.

 

 When Wong got out, Kim took that opportunity to take a better look in the room he was in. It was really different from his room in North Korea - that was basically just a broken bed and a small desk for him to study. The room had the walls painted in sky blue, the desk was full of books and something that Jungwoo assumed it was a really small computer, a huge television in front of his bed and some kind of technology that Jungwoo couldn't figure out.

 

 He was pondering about the stuff on the room when Yukhei came back with a tray full of food that Jungwoo have never seen before. The tall man helped him to sit comfortably on the bed.

 

“Since your arm isn't completely cured yet and you're still sick, I'll feed you. Is that okay?” He seemed reluctant but relaxed when Jungwoo agreed with a small smile. “Uh, I learned korean for four years since my dream was to go to South Korea, that's why I speak it so well! It probably doesn't interest you but I wanted to say it anyways.” He laughed while giving the other one some food.

 

“ _ You're… g-good… _ ” Jungwoo smiled widely and Yukhei looked lost for a while before giving him more food. After finishing the food the chinese man was ready to go, but Jungwoo held his hand with a lot of effort, making him turn back, confused.

 

“Hm? Do you need something?” He put the tray on the desk and sat on the side of the bed.

 

“I’m stinking.” His voice was much stronger after the meal, but still soft as always. The tall man seemed confused. “Can I take a bath?”

 

“Oh!” He laughed out loud. “I was so worried that I completely forgot about it… I’m sorry. I’ll take you to the bathroom.”

 

 Yukhei got up and helped Jungwoo to stand up, giving him support with his arm and then took him to the bathroom. He helped him to take most of his clothes off since his shoulder was still throbbing.

 

“I’ll be right here beside the door, so if you need something just call me.” He smiled and left the bathroom, leaving Jungwoo alone in the huge bathtub.

 

 He tried to relax and tried to distract himself by playing with the clear water, but all his thoughts were focused on the night that he escaped North Korea. Mud covering his feet, rain making his clothes glue in his body, the shots, all the blood covering his mother’s body, his father falling to the ground with two holes in his head, the pulsating pain that covered his body after being shot and how fast the world was spinning around him.

 

 Jungwoo deepen his whole body in the bathtub’s cold water. He closed his eyes, trying to forget and, finally, the so well held scream came out while he was underwater, just stopping when he almost drowned himself.

 

+++

 

 The day passed quickly. With Yukhei proving that he was trustworthy, taking care of him and teaching him how to use some stuff he’d never seen before in North Korea.

 

“Ok, so this is a cell phone. You can carry it to anywhere you want to and it’s really light.” The tall man said while Jungwoo stared at the thing in his own hands. “It’s for communications and other stuff.”

 

“Like what?” His eyes sparkled. Yukhei seemed taken aback by it, but smiled right away and got closer to the clueless boy, grabbing the phone and touching until he finally found what he was looking for.

 

“Come here and smile while looking to the phone’s camera… it’s little dot right here… yes, that’s it! And… done!” He showed the cute picture with a bunny effect to Jungwoo, who widened his eyes in surprise.

 

“Wow! This is so cute! Please teach me how to do it!” Jungwoo jumped a little in his bed, excited to learn how to use the cute effect, making Yukhei laugh.

 

“It’s late in the night, Jungwoo… Oh, I forgot to ask! How old are you?” He smiled again.

 

“I’m 23.” Jungwoo laughed softly when Yukhei made a surprised expression.

 

“I just turned 22! So you’re my hyung! Jungwoo hyung!”

 

“Why are you so shocked that I’m older than you?”

 

“You are so soft… I just thought you were younger…” Jungwoo smiled shyly and Yukhei did the same thing. “Uh, we need to sleep now. I’ll bring my inflatable bed to sleep here.”

 

“What’s a ‘inflatable bed’?”

 

“It’s a bed… with air… I’ll basically sleep on the floor. And that’s totally fine because you are hurt and I am not!” He said before rushing out of the room, Jungwoo laughed again and then sighed.

 

 Did he deserved to laugh like that after what happened to his parents? He knew that Yukhei was just trying to distract him from the sad reality that he was in, but it hurted anyways. Tears started to fall again and he laid down on the bed, facing the clean blue wall while he tried to hold his tears. But he couldn’t do it anymore, so he just let himself break down and sobbed loud like a child, shrinking because of the internal and external pain that he was finally letting out with his tears.

 

 Wong watched him from the door, but decided not to interfere and just left him there, crying his eyes out, calling his parents names and cursing North Korea for all the pain he’s been through.


	2. The Weight of Loss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello uwu here I am again!  
> I really hope you like this one because I'm really insecure about it owo

 The unfamiliar but still sweet smell woke him up. It has been already a week since he escaped from North Korea and five days that he woke in Yukhei’s house for the first time, being around the younger man and having so much freedom to watch and do basically whatever he wanted was still a strange feeling. But the worst part was that he had to pretend that everything was okay.

 

 He vanished the dark thoughts from his head before he could start crying like he did on the first day and tried to get up, his body was still weak but it was surely a lot better than before, now he could walk without having to ask for the other’s help.

 

 Jungwoo walked slowly to the kitchen but stopped himself at the door when he heard an unfamiliar female voice coming from there. He couldn’t understand what they were saying so he assumed that they were speaking in chinese. Even though his voice was a little different from when he spoke korean and it seemed to be talking in an angry tone, Jungwoo recognized Yukhei’s voice and relaxed a little bit.

 

 He was about to go back to his room when the door opened, revealing a small and kind of old woman staring at him in shock, tears falling down her cheeks.

 

“Uh… Hi-” Jungwoo started but the woman cut him off, screaming words in chinese at him and hitting him in the chest.

 

 Yukhei screamed something at her and dragged the woman away from the scared boy.

 

“Hyung, I’m so sorry, but  _ please  _ wait in your room!” He let out a groan when the woman slapped his face, Jungwoo stepped forward but Yukhei just shook his head, asking him to go back to the bedroom, and so he did.

 

 His mind was confused when he sat in the bed. Who was that woman? Why did she screamed at him like that? Why did she hitted him? And why she hitted Yukhei? Is he fine?

 

 When he was about to go there again Yukhei entered the room, his eyes were swollen and his nose red.

 

 Jungwoo got up and went to him as fast as his body let him. “W-What happened?”

 

“You must be hurt, she hitted you… let me see your wound, hyung.” He calmly opened the other’s shirt to check if everything was okay and sighed. “Everything is fine from what I can see. Do you feel anything?”

 

“I’m fine. What about you? W-Who is she?” The slightly shorter one asked, putting his hand softly on Yukhei’s red cheek. “Your cheek is really red… it must hurt a lot.”

 

 Wong looked down in silence, staring at his own feet, then let down a heavy and shaky sigh before the tears started falling.

 

“Oh, fuck…  _ fuck. _ ” He laughed nervously, looking up, trying to stop them from falling, unsuccessfully. “Just to be clear: I’m  _ not  _ sad, I’m just... frustrated, hm?”

 

 Jungwoo stayed quiet, his hand now on the other’s back while patting it to calm him down.

 

 The youngest one stopped crying after some more minutes and stared Kim in the eyes, kindly. “So, that’s my mom.” He laughed, sad.

 

 Jungwoo let out a quiet  _ ‘oh’. _

 

“Yeah, I know. Let’s sit first, you can't be stand up for long, hyung.” They sat down on the older’s bed before Yukhei continued to talk. “She isn’t  _ that  _ bad, just… old fashioned, I think? She doesn’t like that I’m taking care of you because… you’re a north korean refugee. And she really  _ hates  _ them, I’m really sorry for all that, when you appeared there… she kind of losted, you know? Also, hearing me speaking korean? Ugh, she cursed me so hard for that. But don’t worry, hyung! She won’t give us away or I’ll be put in prison for a long time and-”

 

 Jungwoo stopped him from talking more with a warm hug, now  _ he  _ was the one who was crying. Yukhei was risking  _ so much _ to help him, it made him feel more safe and grateful than he ever was in his entire life. They were both strangers to each other, but the younger was helping him and doing everything he could to make him feel safe and…  _ home. _

 

+++

 

 A month finally passed since he woke up, but, even though his wound was getting better, Yukhei brought a doctor to see him almost everyday and do a full checkup.

 

 Jungwoo watched them in silence, analysing the doctor in front of him. He was small and had a handsome face, but also an adorable smile. His name was ‘Kun’ from what he heard from Yukhei, he wasn't really sure of it since they didn't talk to each other.

 

 Yukhei caught him staring at them, which made Kim turn his head down, shy. The taller one laughed shortly and walked towards him.

 

 Wong sat on the bed with a soft smile in his face, making the older one look at him. “Kun hyung said you’re really lucky! As you know, the bullet didn't cut any important veins or something like that, so you’ll be in your normal state soon… he doesn't know why you collapsed yet though, but I guess you were shocked by everything that happened…” His voice softened at the last sentence.

 

“Hmm...” He forced a smile. “I'm sorry, Yukhei, but I'm  _ really _ tired right now. Would you go to somewhere else to talk? Please?”

 

“Of course! You still need to rest. Have a nice nap, hyung!” He patted his hand before leading Kun out of the room.

 

 Jungwoo sighed and laid down on bed with his eyes closed. His heart was beating fast in fear. That night came again. Every little detail of what happened were clear in his mind.

 

 He wanted to cry, he wanted to scream and break everything in the room. But he couldn't move, his body didn't obey to his commands…  _ again _ . Exactly like that damn night. So he just closed his eyes, trying to think about  _ nothing _ and sleep for some short time before Yukhei got back to wake him up for lunch.

 

 Oh, and there was also Yukhei… the younger man who helped him this whole fucking time and that was risking a lot to take care of him. His heart weakened again with the thought of such an amazing person like Yukhei being hurt because of him, the younger one almost never left the house in that whole month and Kim never saw his mother or heard him talking about her again. Jungwoo wanted to disappear, if he wasn't there Wong’s mother wouldn't be crying and wouldn't have slapped him and he would be happy with his family right now.

 

Everything was his fault, if he ran to help his parents maybe his father could've survived and, if he didn't, at least Jungwoo would've died with the two most important people in the world to him.

 

_ I just need to die… and everything will be okay… everyone can be happy again if I am not here to disturb them. _

 

 After some time thinking, he got up quietly, walking to the tray where his plate was. Jungwoo needed to be fast. He stared at the sharp knife in his hands and passed through his wrist, slowly and roughly until he saw the blood dripping to the floor. Thick tears falling down his cheeks while he looked at his cut and bloody wrist.

 

 But he smiled.

 

_ Everything will be fine now. Everyone will be happy again… _

 

 A few seconds later all he felt was an extreme pain, both inside and out. Was that right? Should he feel all that pain? Shouldn't he be happy that he  _ finally _ was doing  _ something _ to end his and others suffering?

 

 His legs trembled and he fell on his knees to the ground, putting his shaky arm on his chest. Blood was now covering his shirt, his thighs and the floor below him. Everything was red and smelled terrible, his body was shaking non-stop, his breath was irregular and his eyes were losing focus.

 

 What was he doing? Dying was the only way to be happy? He didn't knew anymore. He did that without thinking much about it. He just wanted to make people happy, but was that the only way?

 

_ I don't want to die right now. Shit, I don't to die… What do i do now? Shit... _

 

 Then the door opened. He saw Yukhei staring at him in horror before running to him with Kun beside him. He slapped Jungwoo’s hand, making him drop the knife that he didn't even realized that was still on his hand, and hugged him tight while Kun grabbed his arm to stop the bleeding. “What… what the actual fuck are you thinking?! Oh my fucking God, Jungwoo, oh my fucking… you’re c-covered in blood… look at your face, you're  _ so  _ pale right now… oh  _ shit _ ... I’m-”

 

 Kun said something to Yukhei and he nodded. They lifted him up and took him to his bed.

 

“ _ Yukhei… _ ” Jungwoo grabbed the other’s hand, his eyes trying to focus on his face. “ _ Sorry.” _

 

“Don’t you fucking  _ dare _ to say sorry again, do you understand?!” Yukhei sat on the bed, now crying. Kun was taking care of Jungwoo’s wrist the better he could. “Fuck, Jungwoo hyung, we’re here together for a month already! You were doing so well… please tell me what happened… I… I did something wrong, right? I’m  _ so sorry _ , hyung, I’m so  _ dumb _ -”

 

“ _ You did nothing wrong, Yukhei… I’m just… You would be so much happier without me here to ruin your life like this. You deserve so much more than taking care of a piece of shit like me… I mean, we barely know each other and you’re ruining your life because of me, a stranger that has nothing to offer you. _ ” His voice was low and weak, but he was still making his best to stare deeply into Yukhei’s eyes.

 

 Wong closed his eyes tightly before looking at the older one again. “I’m doing this because I want to. You’re not a burden to me, I’m helping you because I  _ know _ you’re an amazing person and… fuck, you lived in a  _ terrible  _ place, hyung! I-I just want you to be healthy and happy.  _ You _ are the one who deserves so much more than just suffering. I’m begging you, hyung, don’t do this  _ ever _ again, ok?! Promise me please!”

 

_ Ok. I promise you, Wong Yukhei… although just time knows if I can fulfill it. _


	3. Night View

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter and the next one will be softer, so expect a lot of uwus being exploded :)

 The more time passed, more Jungwoo and Yukhei were comfortable with each other’s presence, there was still a thin layer of tension in the air after Jungwoo’s attempt a few weeks ago, but the younger needed to leave more than usual nowadays, making himself anxious about the older one, even though he promised and repeated over and over again every time Yukhei had to leave the house that he wouldn’t do anything like that anymore, he stayed worried until he could come back home and see Kim listening to some music from his computer or trying to take selfies with cute effects or even sleeping.

 

 It was 10 p.m when he grabbed the car keys and looked at Jungwoo, tension flowing all over his face.

 

“I’ll be okay, hm? Don’t worry and go do whatever you need to do.” The older rolled his eyes, trying to be playful, and smiled softly. But his eyes were focused on the other’s bandaged wrist, which Jungwoo quickly covered with the blanket, sighing right after. “Do I really need to promise you that I won’t hurt myself every time you need to leave?”

 

“Yes… yes you do, hyung.” He murmured.

 

 Jungwoo sighed, but he knew it was his fault. “I  _ promise  _ that I won’t hurt myself.” Then Yukhei finally smiled in relief. “Now  _ go. _ ”

 

“Yes, sir.” He smirked and left the house.

 

 Kim shook his head, a large smile forming in his mouth while he looked around, contemplating what to do now that he was alone. Then finally realized that, in those almost two months, he never left the house nor even saw outside from a window because Yukhei was scared that they would get caught.

 

_ It’s already kind of late in the night… maybe I can go to the house’s roof Yukhei told me about, just for a little bit. _

 

 He covered himself with a thick blanket and walked slowly towards the door, it was the first time that he would leave the house and his heart couldn't stop beating so fast that he thought it would explode at anytime soon. Jungwoo knew it was probably something that people wouldn't understand but he wanted to see the night view  _ so bad _ . He wanted to know how different it was from his old house in North Korea.

 

 Jungwoo finally opened the front door just to see more walls around the whole house, a big metal door and, finally, stairs on the side of the house. The north korean walked up the stairs quietly, supporting his weight on the stair handrail. He was with his head down to cover it from the cold.

 

 He felt the cold wind hitting his face when he finally got to the roof. There was a big swing that seemed more like a couch and a small table in front of it. But Jungwoo just stared at all the lights of the huge buildings and houses, he’d never seen that much light at night before. It was…

 

“ _ Beautiful _ .” Gasped, while walking towards the swing to sit and watch the view. He felt tears falling and giggled, it was  _ so  _ stupid to cry over a night view. But he didn't really care.

 

 Jungwoo wiped his tears away and took Yukhei’s phone - which the younger had left with him since he liked to take pictures - out of his pocket to take a picture of him and the view.

 

 He tried to get the perfect angle, pouting when he couldn't find it. The roof itself was really dark, the only light was coming from the other buildings around it, so he just gave up and watched the lights with a big and pure smile, trying to cover himself more - even though he knew he couldn't since he was already all covered in the blanket.

 

 It was a new and exciting experience for him, but it he was getting tired, so he laid on the swing to look at the stars.

 

“Wow… these are the same stars that I used to see from North Korea. I thought they would've be different!” Jungwoo muttered to himself, happy to see something he knew.

 

 His parents came to his mind and, for the first time, he kept smiling instead of crying. He remembered all the times that his parents had to drag him back to the house in the middle of the night when he was little because he wanted to watch the stars all night long, which made him giggle.

 

_ I was such a naive child. _

 

 It really _ wasn't _ a happy life there, but he had his few enjoyable moments. And every second and detail of them were precious to him.

 

+++

 

 Jungwoo didn’t realized that he was sleeping until Yukhei woke him up. “What are you doing here, hyung? Fuck, I was so distressed because I couldn’t find you when I came home! I had to call my number! And I told you that is still dangerous for you to leave the house since there are people looking for ”

 

 His vision was still blurry and his mind was still sleepy, making him pout while think about what to say. “Hm, I wanted to see the night view…” Yukhei giggled after a moment and Jungwoo finally opened his eyes to see the younger in front of him. “What?”

 

“You are like a baby, hyung.” Jungwoo buffed and he smiled, giving him a bag. “I noticed that I just gave you my old pajamas… sorry about that. So I bought you some nice clothes and a cellphone!”

 

“Uh?” His mind was still processing every word. After a moment he looked at the bag and took out a black shirt. “Mine?”

 

“Yes, yours.” Yukhei giggled again. “Come down, you need to try these on to see if they fit.”

 

 They entered the house again after Jungwoo was able to stand up without almost falling down from sleepness. The taller one rushed him to the bathroom and told him to get changed.

 

 He was now looking at himself in the small bathroom’s mirror. In contrast with the loose pajamas he used all this time, he was now using a black short sleeved shirt tucked up on black pants. Jungwoo felt strange, but he got out of the bathroom anyways.

 

“I-I don’t know… it looks really awkward, right?” He looked up to Yukhei, that was staring deeply to him. “Yukhei…?”

 

 Yukhei looked down, flustered. “Uh? Ah, s-sorry… you j-just… you are… you are so  _ pretty _ , hyung, really! Like…  _ wow _ ...”

 

“...thanks…?” The room became silent for a long moment while Jungwoo smiled shyly and the other watched him carefully before Yukhei cleared out his throat.

 

“So… is it comfortable?” He was playing nervously with his own fingers, waiting for the answer. Jungwoo just nodded, making the younger smile. “Let’s go then!”

 

 The other blinked a few times, trying to understand. “What? Where?”

 

“You must be getting tired of being here for so long. I’ll take you to eat something!” He put on his jacket and took Jungwoo by the hand. “And I know that I said it was dangerous, and still is, but you need to have some fun. I’ll do my best to protect you, I swear. Now… put on this mask and this hoodie!”

 

+++

 

 Jungwoo watched with dazzling eyes all the people walking on the streets and all the light around him. Everything was stunning to his eyes, even the smallest thing captured his attention, making him ask millions of questions to the younger who watched him with a fond smile in his face.

 

“Do you really think this is going to work?” Kim whispered after some time, pressing Wong’s hand while they walked to the restaurant.

 

“Just… don’t speak, okay? Your north korean accent is too strong. Pretend that you’re sick. Are you hiding your wrist well?” Jungwoo nodded in response and Yukhei sighed in relief. “We are almost there, the food is  _ amazing _ ! I know you’ll love it!”

 

 Jungwoo smiled softly behind the black mask that covered half of his face. It was nice to see the chinese guy excited, it has been a long time since he saw someone so happy like him.

 

 He got so distracted by Yukhei's smile that he just realised that they were already at the restaurant when the younger whispered to him. "We are here, hyung! Be careful."


	4. Skin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay on the upload, guys, I was SUPER busy (and I still kinda am) but here it is!  
> Thank you for waiting and sorry again :(  
> I hope you enjoy it <3

 They were already waiting for the food when Jungwoo noticed Yukhei rubbing and pinching his own hand while looking around nervously, the older let out a soft giggle before grabbing his hands over the small table.

 

“Everything is fine, Yukhei.” He whispered, looking at the younger’s anxious eyes. “No need to worry, just relax and focus on me, hm? I’m well covered.”

 

“But you’ll need take off the mask to eat… I-I didn’t think of that before coming here with you. I think is better for us to leave-” Jungwoo caressed his hands and gave him a soft and warming look to calm him down.

 

“We’ll eat and then come back home, ok? Nobody is going to take me away today, I promise.” Jungwoo flinched when the waitress came back with the food, but Yukhei didn’t let go of his hand until she said something to him.

 

 Kim took the mask down to his chin carefully to eat when she walked away. They ate without saying a word, just looking at the plate. Even though he was calming Yukhei down, Jungwoo himself was nervous, his heart skipped a beat at every person that passed by them. Would he feel like that everyday of his life from now on? The thought scared him while he looked softly at the younger finishing his food.

 

“Thank you.” That startled Yukhei, who choked on his bao du and cursed at himself for it, making Jungwoo laugh out loud at his clumsiness. “Sorry, I didn’t knew I would cause this by only thanking you.”

 

 Yukhei’s cheeks turned pinkish. “That came out of nowhere… I wasn’t prepared.”

 

“You weren't prepared to be thanked for saving my life?” Jungwoo just shook his head, smiling behind his mask, when the younger lowered his head, embarrassed. “I need to go to the bathroom, it’s going to be quick.”

 

“You can’t go alone, hyung!” Wong was ready to get up but the older stopped him by grabbing his hands.

 

“Stay here and pay for the food, I’ll be fine alone. Don't need to worry.” He, then, put the mask back to his mouth, got up and looked for the bathroom for some time. There was just one man, which made him nervous, but he decided to ignored his existence as long as he could.

 

 Everything went well until he had to wash his hand right beside the man.

 

“Must be hard for you.” The sound of the familiar language made him froze in the spot. The smaller man turned to him with a fake smile on his face. Jungwoo continued to wash his hands, pretending not to understand him. “You came all the way from North Korea to here…”

 

 Jungwoo bit his lip under the mask, he could feel his hands trembling and pressed his nails through his hands’ skin, trying to control it. He felt drops of blood starting to appear on his hands while he pressed his nails deeper and deeper, so he stopped, letting out a small and trembling sigh.

 

 Millions of thoughts were surrounding his mind. How did he knew? Who is he? Is he going to take me back to North Korea?

 

_ I can’t go back to North Korea… Y-Yukhei… _ , Jungwoo was ready to go out when the stranger grabbed his wounded wrist, making him gasp.

 

“I know you can understand me.” He tightened his grip, making Jungwoo bit his lip even more when the pain came.

 

“ _ Zeus _ ?” Yukhei entered the bathroom and pulled Jungwoo behind him as soon as he realised what was going on, then started to yell at the man, who looked flustered and apologized in mandarin before getting out of the bathroom.

 

 The older couldn't control himself and without thinking much, just embraced the younger in a warm hug, resting his face in the other’s shoulder. He was just so happy that he came for him. “ _ Yukhei… _ ”

 

“ _ Shh, I’m here now, don’t worry. Let’s go back home, hm? _ ” Yukhei whispered, but didn’t let go from Jungwoo’s embrace until another man came in.

 

***

 

“ _ How did he knew _ ?” Jungwoo whispered while looking at the cars passing by with amused eyes.

 

 They were now sitting on a swing at a small playground, after Jungwoo begged him to stay more outside because Yukhei was scared that someone would catch him again, watching the cars.

 

“I think I saw him passing by us… maybe he heard you speaking korean and figure it out by your accent.” He sighed. “But I’m not sure.” Yukhei looked down and then at him with a worried and fond light in his eyes.

 

 Jungwoo gave him a small smile and patted his arm. He knew how Yukhei was probably feeling right now and, again, it was his fault.

 

_ I can't do anything right, but he's still with me.  _ He felt tears coming to his eyes and bit his lip just to finally realise that they were bleeding. “Shit…”

 

“What happened?” The younger got up and kneeled in front of him in a second.

 

 Kim giggled. “I just bit my lip too hard and it's bleeding a little, but I'm fine.”

 

“Let me see it, hyung.” He took his mask off, looking at his cut lips. “I think is going to get swollen…”

 

 Jungwoo, then, felt his cold and slender fingers grabbing his cheeks, then a thumb wiping the blood carefully from his lips. He was so shocked by the sudden intimacy that shrugged as soon as he understood what was happening.

 

“Sorry, hyung! Did it hurt?” Yukhei got closer. “I didn't mean to hurt you.” Jungwoo looked down put his mask back on to cover his pinkish cheeks.

 

“ _ I said I'm fine, Yukhei _ …” The whisper was so low that the younger barely listened. “Let's go home now. I'm tired and my wrist is starting to hurt again.”

 

 Yukhei smiled softly and helped Jungwoo get up, taking a medium box out of his pocket and giving it to him. “Here.” Jungwoo frowned and took the box in his hands. It was red and soft. “Open it.”

 

 Jungwoo obeyed, seeing a huge and beautiful bracelet as he never saw before. He looked at Wong, smiling from ear to ear. “Why did you gave me this?”

 

 Yukhei put his arm for Kim to see the same bracelet in his arm. “It's cliche, but it's a friendship bracelet. I want you to know that, even though we don't know each other for long, I'll always be here for you whenever you need and I hope we can stay together for a  _ long _ time!”

 

 Jungwoo stared at him for some time, completely in shock and thankful. What has he ever done to receive such a  _ beautiful  _ and  _ amazing _ present?

 

 And, no, he wasn't talking about that pretty bracelet. He just prayed that it was.


	5. Common Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SO SO SO SORRY FOR NOT POSTING!!! I've been really busy with work and planning my trip to see DAY6 in my country but I'm finally back!  
> I hope you can forgive me :(

 Yukhei was feeling distressed since last night on the restaurant with Jungwoo. He didn’t want to leave him alone, but he had to go to work so he just checked on the older, who was sleeping peacefully, before leaving.

 

 When he was about to enter the taxi, his phone rang.

 

“ _ Where are you? _ ” The man’s deep and authority voice resounded from the phone.

 

“Oh, hello, dad. I told you I’m here to work.” His heart crushed every time he had to lie about  _ this.  _ But he knew he dad wouldn’t understand or support nor even just leave him alone like his mom did and that just made him worse than ever.

 

“ _ Are you still working at that filthy office?”  _ Even though Yukhei wasn’t seeing his dad’s face, he could clearly see Mr. Wong’s disgusted face through his voice tone. “ _ That place is terrible, you should come back home. You don’t earn that much money there anyways and I always have to send you some extra money.” _

 

 Yukhei took a deep breath. It was always like that since he moved to Beijing at the time he had to take care of Jungwoo for the first time. “Thank you for worrying about me, but I need to go to work now, sorry.”

 

“ _ Remember that I am your  _ father  _ and not your friend.”  _ His voice was so cold that Wong thought he could freeze right there.

 

“I apologize.” Voice almost breaking and, after that, silence. Mr. Wong hung up. A sigh of relief escaped his mouth while he got out of the cab, heading to his part time job.

 

 It was true that he didn't earn that much money there and that his parents always had to send him extra money to survive, but he  _ had  _ to work because he knew they weren't going to give him money forever and now he had not just himself to take care of.e knew they weren’t going to give him money forever and now he had not just himself to take care of.

 

***

 

“You seem really distracted today, Yukhei.” Xiaoyu, his boss that was a small and cute woman, said while he organized the documents on the table and came to him. “That one goes here and not there.”

 

 Yukhei took a look at the documents and apologized quietly.

 

“Is everything okay? You're not loud as always…”

 

“I'm fine.” He cut her in the middle of the sentence. “Sorry, I just have a lot in my mind right now.”

 

 She patted his hair like he was her little brother. “Don't worry, Xuxi, I'm sure you'll be okay. Here, I can do this so go rest for some time.”

 

“No, no! I can do it!”

 

“I don't want you to mess up my stuff, you stupid kid. Now go rest before I punch your tiny face.” Yukhei smiled and thanked her, then sat in the comfortable red couch.

 

 He felt his cell phone vibrate again, indicating a new message, making his heart race at the thought that could be his father again. So he breathed in and out again. Another message. Wong took his phone out of his pocket and smiled when the name appeared in the conversation.

  
  


**Jungwoo:**

**How do I turn on that small thing that makes food warm?**

 

**Me:**

**You mean the… microwave?**

 

**Jungwoo:**

**YES!! THAT'S THE THING!**

**How do I turn it on?**

 

**Me:**

**Just put the food inside and choose at least one minute to get warm**

**BUT DO NOT PUT ANYTHING MADE OF METAL IN THERE PLEASE OR ELSE IS GOING TO EXPLODE**

 

**Jungwoo:**

**Noted.**

  
  


 Yukhei giggled when Jungwoo continued to ask him questions about the microwave and other stuff at the house. He got so distracted that he didn't saw Xiaoyu behind him.

 

“Your girlfriend?” She whispered, making him jump out of the couch, scared. “What?”

 

“Jesus Christ, Xiaoyu.” He put his hand in his chest dramatically. “Can you make some kind of noise when you walk, please?”

 

“Like what?” Xiaoyu laughed.

 

“I don't fucking know! Put a little bell in your ankle or something. I almost had a heart attack here.”

 

“Nice. Now answer my question.”

 

“What question?” He blinked his eyes fast.

 

“Is that your girlfriend you're talking to?”

 

“Uh? What? No! No!” Yukhei laughed. “It's my friend! And he's a guy.”

 

“So why are you blushing?” A smirk appeared in her lips.

 

 His hands got to his own cheeks automatically, feeling them getting a little warmer. “I-I’m not blushing… I'm j-just… tired! Yeah, I'm tired. And it's hot in here.”

 

“Hm, ok then.” Xiaoyu pretended to go away and, when Yukhei sighed in relief, she took his phone from his hands and ran.

 

“Xiaoyu! Give me back!” He ran after her with his heart racing. She couldn’t know who Jungwoo was.

 

“Oh, it really is a guy!” She said when Yukhei finally took the phone and put it in his pocket. “He’s so handsome and pretty… please introduce him to me!”

 

“No! What the hell, Xiaoyu?!” He felt his cheeks turning red again.

 

“Why not? I need a boyfriend, Yukhei! And he’s so pretty…” She stared at him and covered her mouth with a hand. “I’m so sorry, I… I didn’t knew you were… oh my God, I’m so sorry!”

 

 He got confused for a second before understanding and shook his hands in denial. “No, I’m not gay! You understood it wrong!”

 

“It’s okay, I’ll support you no matter what. You’re like a brother to me and I really adore you.” She nodded to herself like she was pleased with what she just said and left the room, leaving Yukhei confused on the spot.

 

“ _ Fuck… _ ” He sighed and looked around, deciding if he should to clean the room or not just to make Xiaoyu angry. But he decided to clean it up because he needed the money.

 

***

 

 Yukhei was received with a warm and sudden hug from Jungwoo when he entered the house. “You came early!” His smile was wide and seemed genuinely happy.

 

“Are you  _ that  _ happy that I came early?” He pointed to Kim’s arms, that were still around his waist. It didn’t made him uncomfortable, just weird, but he didn’t knew why yet. Jungwoo mouthed a sorry and let go of the younger.

 

“I made some food for you! Come here!” Jungwoo grabbed Wong’s hand and dragged him to the kitchen where some plates full of food were resting on the table. Yukhei faced Jungwoo, who had a proud little smile in his cute lips.

 

“That’s why you were trying to figure out how to use the microwave, hyung?” The older nodded cutely, making him giggle. “Seriously, hyung, you’re so adorable.” He whispered to himself.

 

“Let’s eat!” Jungwoo clapped like seal and sat at the table, making gestures to Yukhei sit beside him… and that’s what he did. “I’m  _ so  _ happy you came earlier. I get really bored when I’m without you.”

 

“Uh? Why?” Wong frowned.

 

“I don’t know… you’re really funny and takes care of me most of the time. I feel empty when you’re not around.” Kim giggled, looking at him. “And, to be honest, you are the first real friend I’ve ever had and the only person I have right now, so you’re really precious to me.”

 

 Before the younger could answer, they heard loud knocks on the door. “ _ Wong Yukhei, open the door! Now! _ ” Yukhei got up so fast at the sound of his father’s voice that the chair almost fell. He looked at Jungwoo in despair and grabbed the older’s small and, now, shaky hands in his own.

 

“Hyung, you need to hide. He  _ can’t  _ see you, okay? Stay somewhere safe in here, I’ll distract him and then you get out of the house as fast as you can.”

 

“Yukhei, I don’t understand. Who’s knocking on the door? What did he said?” Jungwoo eyes were glowing in concern and fear, which made Yukhei’s heart hurt.

 

“That’s my father.” He inhaled deeply. “If he sees you here, he’s going to send us to jail. He doesn’t care if I’m his son or not, I’m going to jail here in China and you… he’s going to take you back to North Korea. He’s an army general, hyung.”


	6. Gratitude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm one day late I'm so sorry :(  
> It's kind of late here and I just finished the chapter so please pardon me if there's any grammar error and correct me in the comments, I'll be very thankful <3

 Yukhei leaded Jungwoo to the closet near the exit before opening the door for his father.

 

“ _ I’m going to distract him and put a loud music in my room, then you get out and run, okay? I’ll call you when he leaves. _ ” When he was about to close the door, Kim grabbed his hand and looked at him with a worried expression. “ _ It's okay, hyung. _ ”

 

 And then Jungwoo was left alone in the dark.

 

 A door opening. Then closing. His heart was racing so fast that he thought he was having a heart attack.

 

 Talking. Steps. Silence. Just silence.

 

 A few minutes passed, but it seemed like hours to Jungwoo. Everything he saw was completely darkness and a small light coming from the bottom of the door. He just noticed that he was holding his breath when his brain begged for oxygen, making him let out a long but silent sigh. His mouth was getting drier and drier every second.

 

 And then…  _ music. _

 

 Jungwoo opened the closet’s door as fast as he could, but making sure to not being too loud, and got out of the house running faster than that day at North Korea. He didn’t knew where to go and he didn’t care, he just had to be far from Yukhei’s father.

 

 But suddenly, after some time, he stopped. It was so dark that he could just see some small dots of light here and there.

 

_ Ok, where am I and how do I get out of here?,  _ He looked around. His heart pounding in fear of the unknown street. He lost track of how much time he spent running, but he knew it was a lot by how his irregular his breath was.

 

 Kim took his phone out of his pocket and almost called Yukhei.

 

_ What if his dad is still there and wants to see who’s calling his son? _   That thought was enough to make the man put away his phone again and sit at the sidewalk, waiting for the younger’s call.

 

***

 

 The time passed so quickly and yet so excruciating.

 

 He was sitting there for almost two hours already, the few spots of light he saw were already fading one by one, his fear was growing every second making him check his phone once again.  _ Nothing _ . Not even one single message.

 

 Of course Jungwoo had been through a lot worse since he was born at the very end of the huge famine that struck North Korea a few years ago. His mother couldn’t breastfeed him because of the lack of food and, even when he was already kind of a grown up child, they didn’t had much food until Jungwoo left school in his teenage years to work, so spending some time on the dark streets wasn’t something new to him.

 

 But that wasn’t the street from North Korea that he knew so well. It was a strange and, consequently, terrifying place for him. Besides that he didn’t knew the language so he couldn’t ask for help and even if he could he was too afraid to ask anyone for help since Yukhei said to not to trust anyone while they were in China since the chinese government worked with North Korea, so he just sat there waiting for Yukhei to save him again.

 

 Jungwoo was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t saw the car parking near him until a hand lifted him up carefully by his hands.

 

_ Yukhei! _

 

 He involved him with a tight hug, his eyes closing because of the car’s light, making his head hurt. But nothing of that mattered at that moment, he was just  _ so  _ happy. “I was so scared, Yukhei.” The other separated the hug and held Jungwoo by the shoulders carefully and said something that he couldn’t understand. His eyes slowly returned to being on focus, making him stare directly at his eyes.

 

 It wasn’t Yukhei.

 

“Kun hyung…” He bowed to his temporary doctor as the older made a gesture for him to enter the car, and so he did.

 

***

 

 Kun drived for a while, the car was in complete silence since neither of them knew how to speak the other’s language.

 

 Jungwoo tapped the older’s shoulder gently when he stopped at the red traffic light. “Yukhei?” Asked softly. The other opened his mouth in shock as if he just remembered something, said ‘sorry’ in a broken korean, - which Jungwoo found it adorable and smiled in response - took out his phone and played an audio Yukhei sent him.

 

“ _Hi Jungwoo hyung! It’s Yukhei! I’m so sorry that I couldn’t go, but my father decided to sleep here today since he came so suddenly to see me… and don’t worry, I said that Kun hyung was the one who comes to sleep here sometimes. You’ll sleep with Kun hyung today, I hope you don’t mind. He’s a very caring and loving person so don’t worry, he’ll take care of you as much as you need, ok? I’m really sorry, hyung._ ” A trembling sigh came before he continued talking, making Jungwoo pout in sadness, but then Yukhei giggled. “ _And why were you so far? Are you some kind of mutant? Anyways..._ _everything will be fine, I will go get you tomorrow in the afternoon, hum? Eat and rest well, hyung!_ ”

 

 Even though he was sad and worried, his heart felt warm again after hearing Yukhei’s voice and his brief explanation. He smiled to Kun and turned his head to the window again, staring at the building’s beautiful lights as he wondered if could someday walk on the streets without the constant fear of being caught and sent back to hell.

 

 He just wanted to go to South Korea as soon as possible.

 

***

 

 Qian prepared some food for him and showed where Kim would sleep. They didn’t talk because of the language barrier, but the older one took care of him like he was his patient or something like that. He even did a quick check up on his wounds, taking the bandage from his wrist since - from what Jungwoo could understand by his Kun’s gestures - was already fine enough and changed the bandage from his shoulder, all of that while smiling and humming some cute chinese song to calm the younger down.

 

 He even covered Jungwoo with a blanket when he was in bed, making sure he was comfortable.

 

 That made Jungwoo cherish and see Kun as more than just a doctor, but he was not sure if he should call the older a friend since they couldn’t communicate well, so maybe…

 

_ A brother?   _ The thought made him smile as he recorded wanting to have a little brother when he was a kid and didn’t understand much about the world he lived in. But now he had an amazing person who took care of him since day one and an unexpected older brother who he was starting to adore by all the small and some big things he did for him now and before.

 

 Tears started to appear in his eyes when Kun left to his own room. It was so good to have them with him even though he didn’t knew how much time they would stay together and how much time himself could endure the pain in his heart. Everytime he remembered what happened and the hardship he was causing to Yukhei and Kun by simply  _ existing,  _ made him want to die to make their life easier. His mind was a complete dark mess and every fiber of his body was telling him to give up everyday.

 

 But they were his first friends and his new  _ family.  _ They risked  _ so much  _ to keep him alive this whole time so he needed to live to show gratitude.


	7. Beauty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M LATE AGAIN I'M SO SORRYYYYYYYYYYY

 Jungwoo let the beautiful blue color inundate his mind. All his thoughts disappearing inside the ocean of the soft color and making him dive into his own world full of blue and calmness. Even though he just woke up, his eyes got heavier as he looked up to the blue ceiling.

 

_ Why did Kun painted the ceiling with blue?  _ He asked in the back of his mind and nobody answered - of course. Jungwoo didn't knew why, but the color made him feel peaceful and safe somehow.

 

 His thoughts were interrupted by the brown door of his room opening with a small creaking, which made him turn his head slightly to it, just to see a familiar and gorgeous face burst into the room as soon as he noticed that Jungwoo was awake.

 

“Hyung! I was so worried!” Yukhei jumped to hug him, but still making sure to don't hurt Jungwoo who was giggling at his ear. “Are you okay?” But Jungwoo just stared at him. It was only one night, but it felt like  _ years  _ to the older one, so he needed to look at his friend for some time before saying anything. Yukhei must've been uncomfortable since Jungwoo saw his cheeks turn red and smiled.

 

“I'm fine.” He finally answered and Yukhei covered his mouth and nose. “What?”

 

“Ugh, your breath smells like a dead rat, hyung.” Jungwoo slapped his arm, Yukhei fell to the ground dramatically and then laughed when Jungwoo got worried, making the older kick his ass two times.

 

 Seeing the younger laugh like that because of him made his heart beat faster. For some reason he really  _ loved  _ to see Yukhei happy like that.

 

“Well, I'm gonna brush my teeth since it bothers you so much and then we can go home.” He got up with a cute pout but Yukhei stood in front of him, still giggling.

 

“Hyung, don't pout like that… I'm going to feel bad.”

 

“That's my goal!” He pouted more and Wong grabbed his lips with his slender and cold fingers.

 

“It's too much for me! You can't do that to my weak heart.” He was half serious and half giggling, but his eyes didn't left Kim's for some time, making the shorter frown. A few seconds passed and he finally let go of his lips, that were now kind of swallowed.

 

 Jungwoo touched his lips, flinching with the small pain that reached him and hit the younger again. “You know that my lips are hurt since that day at the restaurant! I'm angry now, bye.” He rushed to the bathroom and locked the door, a grin appearing on his face when Yukhei started to apologize with a cute voice on the other side of the door. “Okay, I forgive you. Now let me brush my teeth in peace, please.”

 

“You don't have a toothbrush here, hyung.” He laughed.

 

“Oh… I forgot about this little detail.” Jungwoo opened the door laughing along with the younger. His eyes met Kun’s, who was behind Yukhei watching them with a big smile, and he bowed to the older, making Yukhei turn to see his older friend and welcome him with a tight hug, muttering things that Kim couldn’t understand.

 

 But he watched the scene in front of him quietly. He analysed the way Wong touched and spoke with the older one, noticing that he would always keep some distance from Qian, but still with some kind of fondness in his expressions and subtle touches here and there when necessary, but it was still  _ different _ . The most he did was hugging Kun.

 

 It was strange to see him acting like that, the Yukhei he knew didn’t mind touching to expressing affection.

 

_ Maybe it’s Kun who doesn’t like it.  _ He nodded to himself with a little smile in his lips.

 

“Hyung, he’s going to lend you some stuff for you to take a shower and brush your teeth before leaving, is that okay?” Yukhei was now in front of him, his arm resting in his shoulders. Jungwoo agreed shyly and thanked the older with a bow. “He’s shorter than you but he has some bigger clothes because he thought he was going to grow more and they were going to fit him… well, he thought really wrong.” Laughed and, even without understanding the language, Kun kicked his leg with a fake expression of anger.

 

***

 

“I-Isn’t this too…  _ explicit _ ?” He was wearing a sleeveless yellow shirt that looked like a sweater - but way thinner - with tight jeans. They were walking home and he could feel people’s eyes burning in his back.

 

“Uh, not really. Come here, let me fix your hair a little bit.” Yukhei put Jungwoo’s silky hair to the side, making his face fully show for the first time since he had short hair when he first came. “You need to show your handsome face.”

 

 He shrugged, shy by the sudden compliment. “But I’m not handsome…” Whispered.

 

“What?! Do you even have eyes that fucking work? You’re the most beautiful human being I’ve ever seen in my entire life!” The younger was almost screaming, so he had to put his hands over his mouth to shut him up.

 

“You can’t scream in korean!” Jungwoo whispered again and Yukhei put his own hand in front of his mouth in shock, but instead of touching his face he found himself almost holding the older’s hand, making him put them away and Jungwoo did it too, eventually, when he was sure Yukhei wasn’t going to scream anymore. “Let's just go without drawing much attention, please.”

 

 After he said that some girls using school uniforms passed by giggling and saying some stuff while looking at them.

 

“W-What did they said? Ugh, I knew it was a bad idea to dress up like this… I must look really stupid.” Jungwoo covered his arms with his hands as much as he could, Yukhei just laughed.

 

“The girls just said that you are handsome. I can't believe nobody told you how beautiful you are to the point where you can't believe when people compliment you.” He sighed. “We're almost there, come on, hyung.”

 

 They walked in silence for some more time, with Jungwoo nervously looking around and brushing his arms, shy when people giggled looking at him.

 

 Yukhei was right. Jungwoo never received that much compliments in his life - especially from strangers. But it was because he lived to work, he just heard compliments about his work and rarely about his appearance. Also this was the least important thing he ever cared about, Jungwoo just wanted to stay healthy and help his parents.

 

 But, now that he was kind of aware of his beauty by people's reactions, he started to feel the  _ need  _ to take care of his face to be always pretty. Especially for…

 

_ Him. _


	8. You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I'm late again but it's really hard these days I'm sorry :( I really rushed to make this chapter so I'm sorry again guys

 Another month passed by in a blink of an eye. Jungwoo was so distracted by learning more about other countries with Yukhei that a month seemed like a week for him. It was the first time he felt like that in his life, normally a month seemed like a year and a year seemed like a decade, but it felt good and he was happy to be around Yukhei most of the time. Taking out his bandage also helped him feel more comfortable and free even though he still stayed home.

 

 They were watching a japanese cartoon when Yukhei's phone rang and he excused himself from the bedroom. Jungwoo wondered about it: he was doing that a lot these days and, when the older asked, he just shrugged with some kind of tension in his smile and changed the subject abruptly.

 

“Yukhei?” He asked when the younger came back. Receiving a distracted ‘uh?’ in response, which made Kim get up and grab Wong's shoulders, who was surprised by the sudden attack. “Yukhei.”

 

 He blinked a few times before responding to his name being called. “W-What?”

 

“What's going on? You seem really stressed these days and always deceive yourself from this subject. Please, Yukhei, please trust and tell me what's making your mind so busy.” Jungwoo let go of his shoulders and grabbed his huge hands instead, making his own almost disappear when the taller laced their fingers together. “ _ I'm worried _ .” He whispered, looking to the floor.

 

 The younger sighed while caressing his hyung's small and adorable hands. “Jungwoo hyung, please don't worry about me, hm? I'm not stressed, I'm just worried too…” Kim looked at him with curious sparkling puppy eyes, making him gulp. “Look… you… you're already healthy, thankfully. So I'm trying to get a way to us to… go to S-South Korea. I was trying so hard, nobody from China could get us there… but I talked to some people who live there and… well, we're going to South Korea next week, hyung!”

 

 Jungwoo opened the biggest, brightest, most genuine and gorgeous smile Yukhei ever saw coming from the cute guy, it made him giggle seeing him so happy. It was truly contagious when Jungwoo was happy.

 

“Oh my fucking God, Wong Yukhei!” He jumped in him, hugging the taller with all his strength. Both of them were laughing hard at the news. Jungwoo backed off from the hug and kissed the younger cheek repeatedly. Yukhei was paralyzed by that. It was the first time Jungwoo kissed his cheek since they knew each other.

 

“It's so soft…” He mumbled, smiling from ear to ear, making Jungwoo look at him, confused.

 

“Did you said something?”

 

“U-Uh?! No! I didn't said anything!” He laughed it off. Jungwoo frowned.

 

“Are you sure? I thought I heard you say someth-”

 

“Oh, look, it's already 2 a.m.! Wow, hyung it's really late, you need to sleep well, I don't you to get sick.”

 

“But-”

 

“I'm going to my own room now, have a good night, hyung!” He slammed the door, making Jungwoo flinch and fall in his bed.

 

 The sudden loud noise made him remember  _ that  _ day. He remembered how he was shot while he saw his father fall with hole in his forehead. He remembered how the blood kept him from breathing and how the pain made him blackout completely. Jungwoo grabbed his shoulder, suddenly feeling the same pain as the day he was shot. Everything was blurry and confusing, when he turned his head he saw them.

 

 He saw his parents. Screaming for him and bleeding. Now he was feeling his stomach crushing. Jungwoo fell from the bed and crawled to his parents.

 

“D-Dad… m-m-mom… I'm here…” He was half mumbling and half heavy breathing. Jungwoo smiled, trying to grab their hands. But, when he was almost there, they vanished. “Uh…? Dad? DAD! MOM! PLEASE COME BACK! DAD! I AM HERE!” He was screaming as loud as he could, nothing mattered at the moment, he just wanted to stay with them again.

 

 Someone grabbed him from behind and he started to se debatar hard, but the person wouldn't let him go. Who was it? Just one answer came to his confused mind: the shooter. He was there to take him away. Jungwoo grabbed the stranger's hand and bit it until he could taste the blood, but stopped when the person turned him around to see his face.

 

“ _ Yukhei… _ ” Jungwoo breathed, looking around and seeing his room. Then his eyes stopped at Yukhei's bloody hand and couldn't contain his tears from falling. But Yukhei just pulled him and hugged him tight, Jungwoo could hear the younger's heart beating fast. “No… no, no, no! I'm so sorry… oh, no, Yukhei…”

 

“It's okay, hyung.” He whispered and kissed the top of his head, making Jungwoo cry harder. Yukhei pushed him gently from the hug but just enough to look at his face. “Stop crying. I'm fine. What you saw wasn't real. You're fine too, hyung.” He tried to wipe the older's tears after taking him to sit on his bed but ended up staining him with some blood, he was too worried to care about that though. After that, he just stared at Jungwoo, even after all that and with blood stains in his cheek, he was still the most beautiful person Yukhei ever saw in his entire life.

 

 Jungwoo was scared. Now that he was so close to Yukhei, emotionally and physically, his brain couldn't stop over thinking about everything he felt for the younger in the past few months. The chinese guy was the only one who was there to take care of him  _ all the time _ . Jungwoo didn't knew if he was just confused or if his crazy and speeded heartbeat meant that he truly and purely just fell deeply in love with that stupid brat.

 

 After staring at each other for some time, Jungwoo suddenly leaned in and kissed him. He was kissing Yukhei. His lips were finally touching Yukhei's pretty and plump lips. Jungwoo didn't knew what nor why he was doing it, but it was truly amazing. Actually, that was his first kiss, so he just stayed still, nervous.

 

 The kiss just lasted a few seconds before Yukhei pushed him with a surprised look. “Jungwoo hyung…”

 

“Yukhei.” He cut him middle sentence. His hand was now resting on the other's. “Maybe... I like you?” Jungwoo smiled softly when Yukhei opened his mouth in shock. “I don't really know. I never had the chance to like someone before, but I know that what I feel for you isn't just gratitude or friendship. Every time I saw you I thought in the back of my mind how would it be to kiss you and I don't think that's how friendship works.” He giggled and laid down, facing the wall. “Sorry for kissing you like that. Good night.”

 

“Uh…? Oh, ok… hm, good… good night, h-hyung.” Then he just got up and closed the door, this time with more calm.

 

 Jungwoo stared at the wall in front of him with his heart pounding. He touched his lips, remembering the short but strong feeling. And, then, he started crying.

  
_ I messed up again. I can't believe I did that. I'm such a fucking terrible person, he just tried to help me because I'm getting crazy hallucinations and I kissed him like it was nothing and practically told him everything I feel for him.  _ That was all that was consuming his thoughts that didn't even realised the blood getting dry in his cheek.


	9. Breakfast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry.

 Yukhei woke up earlier than usual. Actually, he didn't even slept because of what happened last night. It was so confusing to him, he always thought he was completely straight but something about Jungwoo made his heart weak and warm at the same time. Yukhei even saw porn after he went to bed to be sure and realised that he finally was admitting something he always pushed to the back of his mind: both the woman and the man were incredibly hot. Deep in his thoughts he already had an idea of his feelings towards men in general, but Jungwoo kissing him like that made him accept what he was denying for so many years - it was a still a shock to him though.

 

 He sighed and looked at the clock on the wall, it was just 4 a.m. and his stomach was almost digesting itself already, so he headed lazily to the kitchen, kicking a table on the way which made him let out a weak scream.

 

“Are you okay?” Yukhei jumped, startled by the voice. Jungwoo giggled from the couch, making the younger's cheeks become red. “Sorry, I didn't wanted to scare you… I was here for sometime but didn't heard you coming.” As soon as he got up, Yukhei felt his heart jump out of his body, he was more nervous than ever.

 

“H-Hyung!” He screamed, scaring Jungwoo, and put his hand on his chest. “I almost had a heart attack.” Yukhei fell down dramatically making unrecognizable sounds to add to the performance. Jungwoo walked to him, laughing out loud, grabbed his hand and put on the other side of the chest.

 

“If you are going to be dramatic, at least put your hand where your heart is, you dumb giant.” Then helped him to get up with a smile, when he did Jungwoo didn't let go of his hand, looking deeply at his eyes. “Am I making you…  _ uncomfortable _ ?” The last word came out as a whisper, he was embarrassed about what happened between them.

 

 Yukhei pulled him for a hug instinctively like he always do when he sees the older sad or something like that. “No, hyung, of course not… it's okay, I promise.” They stayed like that for a long time until Jungwoo broke the silence.

 

“Yukhei… I… I know you always try to comfort me because you see me as a fragile older friend…” He murmured in the younger's chest, making him swallow nervously. “But you need to stop. It isn't good for my heart, you know.” Jungwoo giggled, but Yukhei didn't pushed him away like he was probably thinking, he actually tightened the hug, resting his chin in Jungwoo's shoulder even though he was a little taller.

 

“You are my hyung, I need to-” His sentence was cut by the sudden sound of his own belly, making Jungwoo laugh loud and push him away.

 

“I guess you are hungry, huh? Come, I'll try to make something for you. Think of it as an apology.” He made the younger sit down and went to the fridge to try to prepare something.

 

 They stayed quiet for some time. For a long time. Too long until Jungwoo finished cooking and went to him with a bowl of ramen noodles.

 

“I can't believe that you took half an hour to cook ramen noodles, hyung…” He laughed, shaking his in disbelief while putting some noodles in his mouth.

 

 Jungwoo blushed hard. “I-I didn't knew h-how to do it, ok?”

 

“You could've just asked me for help, you know?” Yukhei smiled. “But it's fine, at least I can finally eat something. Thank you, hyung.”

 

 The older smiled while watching, proudly, Wong eat the whole ramen by himself. “I’m glad you liked.” Then they spent more time in silence, eating. The only thing they could hear was the sound of each other chewing the food and drinking water, it was still a little dark and just the weak light above them was ensuring light to their eyes.

 

 Yukhei snapped his fingers with his eyes wide open like he remembered something. “Oh, right!” Jungwoo shifted his attention from the plate to the younger. “About the travel to South Korea: we need to pack our clothes and stuff like that today, but leave some for you to wear until the end of this week… also, I told you I have some friends there, right? You’ll have to take some korean classes with him because your North Korean accent is really thick and some people may have prejudice against you because of it.”

 

 A forced smile appeared in Kim’s face after he heard the last sentence. “Looks like a lot of people hate me and want me out of their precious country…” Yukhei noticed the sadness in his eyes despite the ironic laugh he let out. “I’ll go take a shower now. You should get ready, it’s almost passing the time for you to go to work.” While walking into his bathroom, he smile softly to the younger.

 

 Yukhei would never understand completely how hard it was for Jungwoo to finally think he’s free and then be forced to stay home for months by an unknown guy just to not be sent back to the hell that is his own country, besides having to change habits and an accent he’s been living with his entire life. Not to talk about seeing his parents die right in front of him and being unable to do something.

 

_ But he still genuinely smiles and laughs.  _ He thought about the day Jungwoo was so impressed and happy about the stars in the sky and the lights of the buildings around him, it was so common for Yukhei that he never appreciated such things, but after that day he started smiling when he saw any pretty light. To be honest, Jungwoo affected the way he saw many things around him… especially  _ him. _

 

 Of course he knew Jungwoo was beautiful since he first saw him, but he got more and more drain-away by him everyday, he knew that and still denied it. The kiss came back to his mind, making him get up abruptly from the chair.

 

“Nothing happened… I just need to think that that never happened and everything will go back to normal.” The taller mumbled to himself as he went to his own bathroom. “I’ll focus on anything else but him. He’s like my older brother, yes, my bro. I’ll be fine I just need to go to work and focus on that.”

 

 Meanwhile, in the other bathroom, Jungwoo’s cold tears were blending with the shower’s hot water, whereas the guilt consumed every bit of his brain.


	10. The Travel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy new year everyone! I hope all of you have a lovely 2019 <3

 The days passed by quickly, like flower petals following the wind that blew them away from their trees. Yukhei still behaved like nothing had happened, both inside and outside of his mind. Meanwhile, Jungwoo’s mind was devouring itself, craving for more of Yukhei, more of everything he felt at that moment, but of course he couldn’t have and it was way more painful to know that.

 

 As the older stepped on the cold floor, he watched the younger put his last belongings and close the blue suitcase. Blue. He never really thought about that common color until that day at Kun’s house where his mind began to drown deeply with it. For some reason, Jungwoo realized how much he loved that color… he always did. He knew that blue was a calming color, every article on the Internet said the same thing over and over. And yes, the color was making him as calm as he never was everytime he looked at it, but now it had different feeling... it was just like Yukhei.

 

 Yukhei was his blue.

 

“Oh, hey, hyung! You’re ready, right?” The deep voice took him away from his daydreams. He nodded with a genuine smile. “Perfect! Let’s go, we need to be there in thirty minutes, but don’t worry, it’s really close from here.” Suddenly, Jungwoo remembered: the rooftop. He needed to go there one last time and watch the stars since it was already midnight.

 

 Jungwoo grabbed Yukhei’s shirt all of sudden, making the younger jump a little, frightened. “Can we see the stars first? Just five minutes, I promise.” He took a minute to process what the older said, but eventually smiled, comprehensive, and agreed.

 

 Both of them went outside, the cold air making their noses ache. Yukhei silently offered his hand when stepped on the first step on the stairs, which Jungwoo accepted with a shy smirk in his lips. They walked together, Yukhei was in front of him but always checking if the other was okay over his shoulder. The only thing that was really warm was their hand together, which made the older blush and tighten the grip on the other’s hand.

 

 As soon as they arrived at the rooftop Jungwoo smiled widely and Yukhei stared deeply at him, who pretended not to notice while looking happily at the beautiful stars and the city lights. “Thank you for this.” He stared back at the younger. “Let’s go.”

  
  


*** 

 

 Jungwoo was excited and afraid to see that huge plane for the first time. He did millions of questions to Yukhei, which he answered every one of them with a giggle and a lot of patience.

 

“You go in first, okay? No need to be afraid, I’ll be there in a minute, I just need to talk to my friend real quick. Sit anywhere you want.” Yukhei pat his hair and walked away before the older could protest.

 

 A man in a all dark red outfit went over to him to help him get on the plane, making him flinch, but then agreed anyways since he trusted that Wong did everything for his safety. After he entered, his eyes went wide open and let a ‘ _ wow _ ’ escape from his lips. Kim inspected all the seats, deciding to be closer to the bathroom in case of any vomit coming unexpectedly.

 

 It didn’t hit him how tired and anxious he was until he sat, closed his eyes and fell asleep almost instantly. For a moment, he forgot about Yukhei.

  
  


***

 

 The older woke up with a loud noise in his ears, almost deafening him, but didn’t move. Jungwoo felt Yukhei’s cold fingers outlining every detail of his face, from his eyes to his parted lips, then caressed Jungwoo’s chubby cheek with his thumb, mumbling something in chinese very softly before sighing and turning around. Kim didn’t realized he was holding his breath until that moment.

 

 Jungwoo stayed still for a couple more minutes before pretending to wake up with a yawn, which made Yukhei look at him and smile. “Well, hello there, sleepyhead.” Jungwoo smiled with his eyes half closed. “Look at the window, hyung.”

 

“Hm?” He turned to the plane’s window and almost had a heart attack. The only thing he could see were pretty stars and fluffy clouds. “It’s so pretty!” He looked at Yukhei while clapping his hands like a seal. The younger laughed and clapped together with him.

 

“I knew you were going to like it. We’re almost there, so enjoy the view before we get there.” He smiled fondly when Jungwoo nodded, more excited than normal, and giggled before turning again and closing his eyes.

 

 The defector watched the stars with such a big smile that he thought, in the back of his mind, that his cheeks were going to combust, but he actually didn’t really care about them at that moment. “This must’ve been really expensive…” He mumbled to himself after some time admiring the pretty view in front of him, turning to see Yukhei staring at him with a weary smirk. “What?”

 

“N-Nothing… Oh, about the price! It was free, my friend owed me favor and I told her to pay me with this trip and her silence.” Yukhei gave him a little chestnut bag, which he took happily. “So don’t worry, hyung. I didn’t spent tons of money with this trip and you’re safe. Now eat some of these, since it still is too late to eat a heavy meal… we’re almost there, hyung.” He patted the older’s hand fondly and smiled with his tired eyes. “I’ll take care of you for as long as I can, okay?”

 

 He was struggling to keep his eyes open, but he hold it in until Jungwoo nodded, making him sigh and lay down his head on Kim’s shoulder. Yukhei  _ knew  _ he wasn’t thinking straight, he was too tired to care about it though.

 

 But Jungwoo was fully awake and conscious, that simple gesture made his heart jump so hard he believed Wong was feeling the vibration.

 

_ Is this even…  _ normal _?  _ That thought struck him almost with the same feeling of when the bullet painfully pierced his shoulder.  _ Is it normal for me to like a guy? Should I be feeling this way everytime he smiles or accidentally touches me?  _

 

 The sudden movement of the other’s shoulder made Yukhei move away, confused. “I-I just want to watch the s-stars… sorry…” Jungwoo explained but the chinese simply shrugged off with his hand and turned to sleep again.

 

 Kim stared at the, now empty, little chestnut bag on his hands for a while - thinking about how Yukhei was everything he had now and how he almost screw the friendship they built together because of a stupid five seconds kiss - before tucking it in the trash bag in front of him and bended to the other side, closing his eyes as hard as he could, forcing himself to sleep.

 

 But he didn’t expect that, even in his dreams, he would be with Wong Yukhei again.


	11. The Apartment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for being away for so long, but I had to due to personal reasons... I hope you can understand

“Hyung, we are here, let’s go!” Yukhei softly shook the older’s shoulders to wake him up from his short nap. He was really angelic, the way his hair fell into his eyes so perfectly made the younger’s heart race a bit - even though he pretended it didn’t.

 

 Jungwoo yawned and blinked a few times before getting up, he stayed quiet until they got off the plane and saw everything black which made him grab Yukhei’s arm without realizing it. “Where are we going now?” For some reason, he got the need to whisper, the darkness made him feel like they were still in danger.

 

“Don’t worry, hyung, you’re safe now.” Wong was now in front of him, his big hand fondly caressing Kim’s chubby cheeks. “I bought an apartment for us to stay, so come with me to our  _ home. _ ”

 

 That word made his heart warm and he followed the taller with a shy smile till the silver car. As they got closer, Jungwoo noticed a sly figure blending in the dark, smoke coming out of his mouth. The person turned around when saw them coming, it was a… man? His clothes were too feminine to be a man ㅡ a dark red crop top, long fishnet socks that went from his feet that were covered by black high heels till his waist and shorts that went to his knees ㅡ but his body was definitely masculine, which got the North Korean confused. One thing he was sure, though, that person was insanely beautiful, maybe even more beautiful than Yukhei.

 

“TY!” The taller screamed while waving enthusiastically to the person, who made the same. They were now face to face. “Why are you dressed like that?” Both laughed, but Jungwoo just pouted in confusion and Yukhei noticed. “Don't worry, Jungwoo, he's just trying to shock you.”

 

_ He… _ , Jungwoo repeated in his mind then smiled. He didn't notice but he was still holding the younger's arm.

 

“Hello there.” The mysterious man finally talked after stepping on his cigarette, his voice was soft and deep at the same time. He talked smoothly like he was talking to a scared cat ㅡ which made Jungwoo a little irritated but he knew how he probably looked at the moment. 'TY’, as Yukhei had called him, bowed to Jungwoo with a big smile cutting his face. “My name is Lee Taeyong, but you can call me TY if you want. That's how some of my friends call me and… I don't normally dress like that - even though I look really hot in it.” He giggled, making Kim blush “My boyfriend made me wear this to my first encounter with you. He wanted to make you shocked.” His laugh was an awkward mixture of air and saliva but made him look cuter.

 

 The younger cleared his throat to catch the attention of the other two. “Okay, okay. Let's get going, it's already really late and I want to lay down on my new bed.” Yukhei entered the car in a hurry.

 

“Aw, are you jealous of your  _ boyfriend _ , baby Lucas?” Taeyong let a sly smile out when Yukhei tried to smack his head. “Don't worry, I already have my own man!”

 

 Jungwoo laughed shyly after entering the car and sitting besides Yukhei.

 

“Oh, Jungwoo.” Taeyong called after starting the car. “You're  _ really _ cute, by the way.” He winked before going full speed to the road.

 

 The other couldn't help but blush again and mutter a small ‘ _ Thank you _ ’. Wong suddenly grabbed his hand, Kim turned to him, kind of shocked by the sudden action of the younger. He was not looking back at him, but got closer to his ear after a few seconds passed.

 

“You seemed cold, hyung.” Yukhei whispered and backed out a little bit, but just enough to look at Jungwoo in the eyes before going full back. His big hand was still caressing the little hand of Jungwoo.

 

 The older felt his heart almost exploding even though Yukhei already told him to forget about it, he just saw Jungwoo as a brother. That thought made him want to cry again, so he turned his attention towards the window besides him, watching the dark streets getting slowly filled with the lights of the city. It was so late in the evening but the lights were still on like the night had just started.

 

 Jungwoo smiled with relief when he saw so many words he could recognize and a sensation of warmth went through his body as well as some shivers when he thought about what his parents would think about the beautiful and bright city of Seoul. He quickly brushed them away, he didn't want Taeyong to see him have one of those episodes. His eyes closed slowly while he used his breath to calm himself down and, a few moments later, he felt Yukhei's hands fondly caressing his hair. Jungwoo opened his eyes and locked them on Yukhei's.

 

“Is everything okay, hyung?” He whispered after leaning closer to the other. Kim just nodded with a soft smile. “Are you sure? You're getting sweaty and I can see your eyes watering…”

 

 Jungwoo took the taller's hand off of his hair and intertwined their fingers. “I'm okay. I promise.” Then he let go of his hand and went back to watching the lights and reading the random signs on the street. He could feel the piercing stare of the other on his back but just sighed.

 

 About one or two hours later they finally reached their apartment. It was way bigger than the small house back in China. His heart was pounding like crazy, he glanced at Yukhei, who didn't seem affected at all by the big building, but again, he was the one who chose it.

 

“Here's where I leave both of you.” Taeyong smiled through the window. “Your stuff are already in there so don't worry. I'll come back here tomorrow with Ten, we still have a lot of things to do until you can get really comfortable, Jungwoo.” The beautiful man waved happily before leaving.

 

 Jungwoo watched the car disappear within the lights and turned to Yukhei, who watched him carefully with that cute smile of his. “Come on, hyung. Let's take a shower, eat something and get some real sleep.” He locked arms with the older and walked like that until they were finally at their own apartment, then he got nervous. “Look, I know it might seem really expensive compared to where we were living before…”  _ It already does.  _ “...but don't worry, I'm used to this kind of lifestyle and I wanted to give you a good place to stay with me, it's not that expensive for me.” And, when the door opened, that was the moment that Jungwoo realized that Yukhei was filthy rich.

 

 It was like the double of the old house, which made Kim's jaw drop. “I… I didn't know you were…” He stuttered, entering the apartment.

 

“Rich?” He laughed nervously before closing the door behind them. “Yeah… I don't really like talking about it because it's my dad's money and not mine. But I'm studying to earn my own money.” He snapped his fingers and turned Jungwoo to face him with a big smile on his face.

 

“W-What?” Jungwoo could feel his cheeks getting pink all of a sudden and cursed himself in the back of his mind.

 

“You'll need to go to college with me!” Yukhei said happily, but Jungwoo felt like a bucket of ice cold water just hit his face. Not only the water, but the whole fucking bucket.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll try update every thursday since I already have some chapters done ^^  
> Also, thank you for reading until the end!!! It means a lot to me <3  
> If you want to follow me, my twitter is @staywithski (I don't really post right now since I don't have followers lol but I'll post!!)


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